giant buddhas and hot pink helmets

I wonder if there’s a Buddha that Taiwanese people paipai to to protect them from crazy foreigners on scooters. Today my foot has been officially shoved into my mouth for every comment I’ve ever made about Asians being bad drivers. Pappa Svend has risked his life numerous times while teaching me to drive back home (both my first time, and when I learned to drive a manual)… It’s scary to be the driver but I can’t even imagine what it feels like to be the teacher when a girl is screaming in the driver seat as the car goes in reverse toward a tree rather than forward toward the wide open road (and then instead of hitting the brake she stomps on the gas). God bless my father’s patient heart for ever getting into the car with me after that incident years ago. That’s obviously a blast from the past but I couldn’t help but think of him today when Susan’s sister Sandy came by to teach me to drive her scooter. The first thing we did was head to the store so I could get a helmet. I was debating between a black on with flames on the side or a hot pink one. I opted for pink … it’ll match better with the Hello Kitty stickers I’m going to put all over it. I bought the helmet and then it was time to throw myself into the lion’s den. I was all over the road at first- swerving between the lanes. When a few stray dogs passed through the road I imagined them as pins and me as a big hot pink bowling ball… luckily I didn’t knock any of them down. My skills definitely picked up though and I was eventually able to navigate my way around while staying relatively close to the right side of the road. So now I’ve finally gotten started on all 3 things I wanted to learn while I’m over here…. Chinese, scooters and chop-sticks. Not bad for a week’s work.
I’ve also been pretty busy seeing the sights and sounds of the area. On Friday I went to Lotus Lake which is completely surrounded by Buddhist temples. I felt like it could have been taken right out of Disney world with all the colors and statues. First I walked out on nine-cornered bridge (a zig-zag bridge that the ghosts can’t cross) to the Dragon and Tiger Pagodas. You enter though the dragon’s throat and exit via the lion’s symbolizing the transformation of bad luck to good fortune.

Another pavilion was shaped like an even bigger dragon with a winding body that you can walk though… then you get pooped out at the beginning of a long pier that leads out to another Pagoda. I spent most of the day walking in and out of animal bodies, temples, and eventually a church for a little taste of something familiar.
Saturday was just as eventful. I accompanied Susan to a lunch reunion with her grad-school classmates. We went to lunch in Tainan, a city about an hour north of Kaohsiung and then toured one of the men’s factories where they made this health drink to keep you young and beautiful. I even got a box which they sell for almost $200 as a gift! Most of the people were older (very wealthy) men who liked to drink. This is where I learned the meaning of “campei” which basically translates to “empty your glass immediately or you lose all your street credit.” A lot of the men were introduced as uncle something (out of respect since they were all older) and a few of them said that since they were uncles I had to campei…. also out of respect? I think I was just the easiest and most obvious target. One of the men owned a company that sells bike racks all over the world and another sold fish which he had changed the genetic makeup of so they glowed things like “I love you” or something….. at least that’s what Susan told me. I was definitely dining with the crème de la crème of the area.

~love from inside the tiger’s throat~

stranger in a strange land

goodbye dinner at the Mohawk House

So here I am, a stranger in a strange land. Within the few days that I’ve been here I’ve definitely gotten an interesting taste of the Taiwanese culture and I’m excited for more. The other day I was walking along the Love River in Kaohsiung when a 40ish year old man stopped short and, with a big grin on his face, waved and said “Hello” then carried on his merry way. Now I have to admit being stared at by everyone you pass and being approached by strangers could make one feel like a circus attraction… but I’ve decided to declare myself a celebrity. That happens to them too right?
Well let me start from the beginning. The whole commute was smooth as butter. We got to the airport in plenty of time. I passed through security without going off (which for some reason always makes me feel like a champ). I wasn’t disappointed by the airplane food despite the fact that I had 3 chicken dinners in a row. I even had a whole 3-seat row to myself for the first part of the trip. So I got to Taiwan and by local benefactor Susan took me under her wing. She picked me up at the airport and brought me back to her house. I basically have a whole floor of my own with a big bedroom, balcony and bathroom. There is a big beautiful pool that I have been loving during the hot hot heat but apparently the Chinese aren't into swimming because i've had it completely to myself every time. This is way more than I could ever have hoped for.

I got here pretty early and despite every morsel of my body wanting to fall asleep I pressed on and got a nice little tour of Kaohsiung. We walked around a department store and all of my senses lead me too none other than a Cold Stone Creamery hidden among endless shoe stores and Hello Kitty displays. I mistakenly thought that maybe things wouldn’t be so different here…. How could it be if there’s a cold stone right? Wrong!
I didn’t end up getting any ice cream because Susan wanted to introduce me to a local beverage that is all the rage in Taiwan. I only wish I could insert a straw into this page so you could all try it but just lend me your imagination and I’ll do the best I can to share the experience of zhenzhu nai cha (or Bubble tea for those of us who struggle with our Mandarin). The drink is a cold milky flavored tea with tons of chewy tapioca balls on the bottom. It’s served with a big straw that’s thick enough to suck up the tapioca balls. I have to admit that I enjoyed the drink more for its novelty than for its taste. I couldn’t quite get over the fact that every time I took a sip I had to chew for the next ten seconds. Yesterday I had something that may have been even stranger. It was definitely better though.

Another Taiwanese favorite is a dessert of shaved ice + everything under the kitchen sink. It’s made on almost every street corner and is obviously very popular among all age groups. Susan led me through the process step by step: First we got bowls by the register and went down a buffet style row of different ingredients. I’m not sure of everything that went into my bowl but it included: papaya, pineapple, tapioca cubes, peanuts and sweat potato. We paid according to weight and they covered the ingredients with shaved ice and topped that with some sugary syrup. I was definitely apprehensive, maybe because of the sweet potatoes and peanuts, but it was so tasty and quite refreshing. Definitely beats a snow cone.
Believe it or not, I have done a few things that don’t involve food. Yesterday Susan took me to this beautiful Buddhist temple and told me a lot about their beliefs. It was definitely an eye opener. There were something like ten different Buddhas in the temple, each serving a different purpose. There was a woman Buddha that you “paipai” or pray to for issues involving fertility, a child Buddha that people brought toys to, and others specializing in money, family etc. The whole process is really interesting. If somebody has a question to ask the Buddha they’ll go to the temple and take these two wooden blocks, and rub them together before dropping them on the ground. If the Buddha wants to answer their question, they’ll land on opposite sides (the equivalent of a head and tail if 2 coins are dropped) repeatedly. If the answer is yes then you pick out a stick with a number on it and drop the blocks again to see if that’s the right number (the answer’s yes if they land on opposite sides). Each number corresponds with a specific drawer which contains a paper with some type of saying/ advice on it. Another interesting thing is that the Buddhas are mobile. They have these ornate display cases (we’re talking flashing lights and carvings everywhere) that a Buddha can be transported to another temple in. I guess the Buddhas like to visit other Buddhas at their temples…. especially during festivals. Nobody can pass up a good party!

Buddha carrying case

incense holder

To get to the guts of life… I don’t have a job or a clue how to speak Chinese but I am in good health and spirits. Random highlight: seeing a family of 4 on a single scooter.

~Love from the East~